Interpersonal Relationship

Over the weekend, I watched a movie called Garden State. As the story goes, Andrew Largeman is the male protoganist who shuffled through life in a lithium-induced coma until his mother's death inspired a vacation from the pills to see what might happen. A moderately successful TV actor living in Los Angeles, "Large" hasn't been home to the Garden State in nine years. But even with 3,000 miles between them, he's been unable to escape his domineering father Gideon and the silencing effect he's had on his son from afar. Stunned to find himself in his hometown after such a long absence, Large finds old acquaintances around every corner living quite unique lives as gravediggers, fast food knights and the panderers of pyramid schemes. Meanwhile, at home, he does his best to avoid a long-simmering but inevitable confrontation with his father. By a twist of fate, Large meets Sam, who is the female protoganist, a girl who is everything he isn't. A blast of color, hope and quirks, Sam becomes a sidekick who refuses to ride in his sidecar. Her warmth and fearlessness give Large the courage to open his heart to the joy and pain of the infinite abyss that is life.

This movie, is a good example of media that portrays interpersonal communication. This movie portrays the different kinds of relationships that can be known to mankind. One of the concepts I'd like to talk about is the Knappp's Model of Relational Development. His models descibes the progression and development of relationships as a series of 10 stages in two phases. Stages 1 to Stage 5 is the coming together phase while Stage 7 to Stage 10 is the coming apart phase. However, in this movie, the director talks more on the escalation phase of this model.

Large and Sam first met at the hospital. Stage 1 of initiating occurs when the two screened and filtered themselves. This stage occurs in a very short period of time, sometimes as short as 10-15 seconds. In this stage, both Large and Sam are concerned with making favorable impressions on each other. They may use standard greetings or observe each other's appearance or mannerisms.

In the next stage, the audience see that both Large and Same ask questions of each other in order to gain information about them and decide if they wish to continue the relationship. We see them getting to know each other better and spending more time with one another. Besides that, they also meet each others' friends and families. This is Stage 3 of Intensifying occurs. Self-disclosure becomes more common in the intensifying stage. The relationship becomes less formal, the interactants begin to see each other as individuals, and statements are made about the level of commitment each has to the relationship.

Large and Sam become a pair in the integrating stage. They begin to do things together and, importantly, others come to see them as a pair. A shared relational identity starts to form in this stage. It is evident when Large's friend asked him, "Where's your girl, Sam?" and she was pleasantly happy with it.

Finally, the bonding stage occurs. During the bonding stage, a formal, sometimes legal, announcement of the relationship is made. Large and Sam becomes serious and a relationship was forged between them.

Even though many critics suggest that not many couples reach Stage 4 and Stage 5, I do feel that it is not impossible to reach. Love doesn't necessary only mean passion and fire, but it also requires the two individuals to work on it.

So what do u feel about relationship?